Not a normal Saturday

We are not the type of people that boat or camp on the weekends.  We work- usually all Saturday.  It is not unusual for Gordon and I to call it a day at 4 pm and come in and shower after being covered in sweat and dirt.  The kids have long since deserted us but there is still work to do.  Lots of work.  Today we got up and did the usual saturday inside jobs- cleaned bathrooms, bedrooms, mow the lawn, and put clean clothes away.  Then we took off.  We stopped by my parents and visited while the rain passed.  Then we headed up Squaw Peak.  David had told us about a great hike so we did that- Buffalo Peak.  Then Bridie, Matthew, James and I hiked down rock canyon while Gordon and the other kids drove around and picked us up.  We came home to get ready for James' last party with friends.  It has been a great weekend so far.  Last night we did pizzas for Adaline and her friends for her birthday earlier this week.  It's been a great week.  I can't wait to see how the rest of the weekend shakes out.

A slow death

Today was a really hard day.  We finished running James' errands for his mission.  We had a great time together.  At Target we got Iccee's.  James was teasing me that he never got them as a kid.
Then we came home and finished cleaning out his room.  That has been hard.  And very final.  Going through all his stuff.   All his memories and boxing them up.  He would get something out and talk about a particular camping trip or something he did in High school.  It was really hard for me to hold back the tears.  It is the death of James' youth.  And eventually I broke down and cried.  And he put his arms around me and told me that everything is going to be all right.  I tried to pull it together but I just couldn't stay in that room any longer.  All the hours he spent studying at that desk are over.  The mess he would have in that room is over.  It all is coming to an end and I am struggling today.  It is like living in slow motion, knowing what is going to happen and each day getting closer and closer and knowing there is nothing to stop it.  September 3rd will come.  I can't stop time.  James will leave and everything will be different.  Our family will never be the same ever again.  A friend once told me how hard it is to send a child on a mission is the churches biggest secret.  I feel like my heart is being ripped out very, very slowly.
 I am living that secret.  It is hard but there have been some very tender mercies during this time.  Last week I was mowing the lawn.  There is nothing like sitting on a riding lawn mower and just thinking.  The thought came to me that sometimes we hold on to something and don't want to give it up but the Lord has something better for us if we will just let go.  I need to let go of all I hold dear in order to be given something better.
All of James' friends have gone either to college, missions, or into the military.  He really has no purpose here he needs to move on.  I definitely don't want a 30 year old living at my house with no life.
Gordon and I went to the temple and I was reminded of the promises I made to give everything to the Lord.  Even my son.  I have thought a lot about Hannah in the Old Testament.  She gave up her son.  And now I have to give my son to the Lord.  He will be in the Lord's hands and that is a pretty good place.
I am trying to put on a good face and be happy for James but sometimes I just need a really good cry and then I can move on with life.  Today was that good cry.  Now I can be excited for him and everything the Lord has in store for the next 2 years.

Just the 2 of us.

Today was somewhat the new normal.  It was just Eleanor and I.  It is going to be an interesting year with just Eleanor. I am going to have to get really creative, organized, and definitely more 'fun'.  We ran our errands (visit taught and helped at the school) and then came home.  That's when I thought 'Now what?'.  What do I do with a single child?  We did survive and the kids will be getting a hot dinner from the crockpot and fresh rolls even though I think I will be in the car from 3-6 straight.  I am looking forward to spending time with my baby.  She just might not be quite as excited to spend that one on one time with me.  I need to get back in the young mothers group again.  I've been out of it for so many years.  I think once I learn to re-stretch my wings we're going to be just fine.

Indentured servant

I tease james that he has almost worked enough to no longer be my indentured servant..  he has helped me so much the last few days.  We have got some great projects done.  One's that required a man but that Gordon doesn't have the time to do.  We still had a patch of dirt in the backyard that needed to have dirt brought in and planted with grass.  Today we took the trailer over to get some dirt.  They loaded up the trailer and we drove home very slowly.  When we got home we got to work with the wheel barrow and trailer behind the riding lawn mower.  It was hard work and took a VERY long time, but we got it done.  Then we returned the trailer and went to Ripples.  A much deserved treat.  One week from today James checks into the MTC.  I am so excited for him!  We still have a lot to get done but we have time- 7 days to be exact (clean up and pack away his room, finish shopping for his mission stuff, pack the stuff he's taking).

Adaline is 14

Adaline turned 14 and it was so uneventful I felt kind of bad.  We went out to eat as a family at the Pizza Factory Monday night because the night of her birthday she had young women's.  It was their Standards night so they fed the Young men and Young women dinner.  Monday night after she had gone to bed Bridie, Eleanor and I wrote in dry erase markers on her mirror.  Then when she got home from school she and I went to the fabric store because she wanted some "yo-yo makers".  I had no idea what they were but we got them and she's thrilled.  That's all that matters.  On our way home I had to gas up so she got a frazil at the gas station.  Then she was gone the rest of the day to young women's.  Adaline is such a good and kind person.  She is so full of goodness towards all her siblings.  She truly is a great example for all of us.

Education week

My parents anniversary.

My Education week attendance has been spotty throughout the years.  This year Emily and her kids came for the week.  Marilyn, Grace, and Owen also came for the week and they all stayed at my parents.  Too bad my parents weren't there.  We really did miss them.  They left for Montana Tuesday.  My mom did come with us Monday to classes and it was so much fun to have her around.  I was invited to go by Emily and Marilyn Sunday night but I thought "I'm too busy.  My kids are going back to school tomorrow."  But I set my alarm to wake me up just incase....  I got up and decided to go.  I'm so glad I did.  I ended up going for 3 days.  Monday, Wednesday, Friday.  Great classes!  Everything from home organization to Satan's tactics.
I would drop Eleanor off at my parents along with all the other kids.  She had a great time playing with her cousins.  In fact I wasn't going to go Friday but she wanted to go play with the cousins so I dropped her off and got in 3 classes.
James also went for the whole week because everyone is gone.  It's sad being the last one left behind.  The last night James was able to see the Meet the Mormons movie.  I'm glad he got to see it before he left on his mission.  I would drop James off everyday and Gordon would bring him home.  He hates not having his own car.  Matthew has taken it over.
The first day I remember sitting in class thinking 'This is so cool.   I get to sit in a class and learn about the gospel.'  I think I've been in primary too long :).
Next year might be a little tricky with Eleanor in kindergarten but I hope it will turn out.

Blue died

We had a bird named blue.  He was found by our neighbor riding his bike home from work one evening.  This man put the bird in his jacket and brought it home for his family.  At the time his wife had really bad health and couldn't take one more thing so they called and asked if we wanted the parakeet.  Matthew wanted the bird and we had a cage from James' parakeet, Spanky.  Matthew took care of it for several years but then just felt like he didn't have the time to give the bird so he gave it to Jacob.  Jacob and Blue hit it off immediately.  Jacob would take him out of his cage and play with him.  Last night Jacob found Blue in the bottom of his cage nearly dead.  He died minutes later.  Jacob was heartbroken.  I cried with him.  It was so sad.  Then we left and Gordon wrapped up the bird in tissue paper and put him in a sack.  Today we will bury the bird.  Jacob is such and interesting person.  He rarely shows emotion but when he does you can tell he feels it so deeply.  I told Jacob we could get another bird if he wanted.  He said it had to be a young bird so it would live a long time.

First day of school 2014-2015

Today was the first day of school for everyone but Eleanor.  We got everyone off ok from 7 to 9 am.  Isaac is in 6th grade at our neighborhood school.  Jacob and Bridie are in 1st and 3rd in the Chinese immersion program.  Eleanor and I dropped James off at BYU to go to education week.  Then I had to get one of my tires fixed because it had a hole in it.  It was fortunate because I had forgotten Eleanor had a dentist appointment so we didn't get all the way to Thanksgiving Point and then have to turn around.  We went to the Bean museum instead.  We have a pretty good day.  I'm interested to see how Eleanor and I do alone all day together.
Last night we had the best family home evening.  Gordon gave all the kids fathers blessings.  During James' I felt that here are people in Korea waiting for him to go and teach them the gospel.  It is comforting to know that he is leaving us for a great purpose.  Then Gordon finished giving everyone a blessing I asked James if he would give Gordon a blessing.  It was a wonderful experience.  James is such a great kid and is becoming such a great person.  I am so proud of him.

James' Farewell

James's farewell is something I've been dreading ever since his mission call.  I was really afraid I would bawl through the whole thing.  The Thursday before I remembered I had scheduled a musical number for James' farewell.  Gordon and James' pulled something together (God be with you til we meet again, are you serious???).  Gordon played the piano and James played the violin.  James spoke on following the prophet.  He did a great job.  Gordon's parents, his sister Katie and her family, Marlene (Bill's wife), my parents, Christina, David, Emily, and Julia's families all were able to come.  Emma also came with Emily.  My cousin Brin's family came.  It was so great to hang out with them!  We had a blast- other than the kids that got bit by wasps while playing on the swing set (I felt soo bad!)  Tons of good food.  Great company.  It was a wonderful send off for James.

   

The drive home

We broke the drive home into 2 days.  We drove through the "gorge" and hiked some waterfalls with a million of our closes friends.  It was pretty crazy.  The parking, hiking, and keeping track of all the kids.  We were glad to be back on the road.  That night we stayed at Emily's and then drove the rest of the way the next day.  James' got books on tape for our road trips this summer and that was so fun.  On the way home from Hermiston we listened to one of the Harry Potter's.  Some of my kids were so excited that they didn't do any electronics for 10 hours in the car.  It was a record for our family.

Oregon Coast

The next morning we got up early and drove to the coast.  It is not the beach, it is the coast.  We stopped at the Tillamok cheese factory and had the tour and got ice cream.  When we got to the coast, not beach, it was cold and windy.  It was 95 degrees in Portland but freezing at the coast.
We set up a spot with an umbrella, beach towels, and snacks.  We stayed an hour and a half and left because it was so miserable.  It was gorgeous however.  Athena said it was her 3rd time to the coast and that was the best day she'd had at the coast.  We were with Emily who just moved from Florida so we know what a good beach is like.  Athena left early and Emily and I headed out on a wonderful adventure.  We stopped at an Air museum, road side stands, and anywhere else we wanted to stop.  We did eat dinner at a McDonalds in Salem because Emily's GPS took us that way.  It was a great road trip.

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